Friday, May 27, 2011

generally.


GENERALLY THINKING ....


Whatever happens happens for a reason. Is it always like that ?

Can't somethings happen just like that ?

can't we just grow over them . Forget them ?

Just let them go .

And pretend it never happened .





Is God going to teach me another lesson ?
or a deep desire , a dream , a wish is going to come true ?




I don't want a lesson i've had plenty.
I am a changed young woman.(can he *God*see?)
I just want some wishes to come true.




P.S:- i will post something better soon.








Monday, May 23, 2011

my favorite quotes

BY HARUKI MURAKAMI

from Kafka on the Shore

"Memories are what warm you up from the inside. But they're also what tear you apart."


"Anyone who falls in love is searching for the missing pieces of themselves. So anyone who's in love gets sad when they think of their lover. It's like stepping back inside a room you have fond memories of, one you haven't seen in a long time."


"Sometimes fate is like a small sandstorm that keeps changing directions. You change direction but the sandstorm chases you. You turn again, but the storm adjusts. Over and over you play this out, like some ominous dance with death just before dawn. Why? Because this storm isn't something that blew in from far away, something that has nothing to do with you. This storm is you. Something inside of you. So all you can do is give in to it, step right inside the storm, closing your eyes and plugging up your ears so the sand doesn't get in, and walk through it, step by step. There's no sun there, no moon, no direction, no sense of time. Just fine white sand swirling up into the sky like pulverized bones. That's the kind of sandstorm you need to imagine.

An you really will have to make it through that violent, metaphysical, symbolic storm. No matter how metaphysical or symbolic it might be, make no mistake about it: it will cut through flesh like a thousand razor blades. People will bleed there, and you will bleed too. Hot, red blood. You'll catch that blood in your hands, your own blood and the blood of others.

And once the storm is over you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what this storm's all about."

from What I Talk About When I Talk About Running

"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."


from Norwegian Wood

"But who can say what's best? That's why you need to grab whatever chance you have of happiness where you find it, and not worry about other people too much. My experience tells me that we get no more than two or three such chances in a life time, and if we let them go, we regret it for the rest of our lives."

from Sputnik Sweetheart

Why do people have to be this lonely? What's the point of it all? Millions of people in this world, all of them yearning, looking to others to satisfy them, yet isolating themselves. Why? Was the earth put here just to nourish human loneliness?"




by Paulo Coelho

from The Alchemist

People are capable, at any time in their lives, of doing what they dream of."
— Paulo Coelho


"One is loved because one is loved. No reason is needed for loving."


"There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure."

"Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own."


"When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too."


from Eleven Minutes
"Waiting hurts. Forgetting hurts. But not knowing which decision to take is the worst of suffering."


"Everything tells me that I am about to make a wrong decision, but making mistakes is just part of life. What does the world want of me? Does it want me to take no risks, to go back to where I came from because I didn't have the courage to say "yes" to life?"


"Passion makes a person stop eating, sleeping, working, feeling at peace. A lot of people are frightened because, when it appears, it demolishes all the old things it finds in its path.

No one wants their life thrown into chaos. That is why a lot of people keep that threat under control, and are somehow capable of sustaining a house or a structure that is already rotten. They are the engineers of the superseded.

Other people think exactly the opposite: they surrender themselves without a second thought, hoping to find in passion the solutions to all their problems. They make the other person responsible for their happiness and blame them for their possible unhappiness. They are either euphoric because something marvelous has happened or depressed because something unexpected has just ruined everything.

Keeping passion at bay or surrendering blindly to it - which of these two attitudes is the least destructive?

I don't know."

from the zahir
"When someone leaves, it's because someone else is about to arrive."


from The Witch of Portobello

"You are what you believe yourself to be."


from Brida
"When you find your path, you must not be afraid. You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way."



"Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day."


"Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle."


"We pretend to be strong because we are weak."

by Amitav Ghosh
from shadow lines

"they all lived in stories, because stories are all there are to live in, it was just a question of which one you chose. .
."


A lot of them i haven't written and some i might have missed.... i like to read them over and over..they make me feel better.
my condition is better i think..better than it was before my emotional outburst... i feel like i am recovering from an illness.
i am trying. trying to be happy, to be positive.
my two exams went good. it makes me feel better.
and Arpit, thousif , Ankit bhaiya.. thanks for your support i really appreciate it. Thanks a lot ! :)

Monday, May 16, 2011

because i find it hard to understand myself

my pc's not working ....my first post from my phone.....

I don't understand what is happening to me. I am clueless.
I feel miserably sad i dont have a reason to be happy.
i feel lonely i feel like talking to someone ...hence this post.
I am miserably in love with my ex .. I want him back..he says he still loves me sometimes when he's drunk..we are very good frnds..i never asked him if he really means it when hes sober..i dnt want to loose him..but i sometimes feel i should get over it.. But i want him .... I feel trapped..i dont find a way out.

I have a frnd my childhood best frnd ...shes like a younger sister to me..i know everything about her but she doesnt ...now i dont like the idea ..it looks as if i am hiding my real self ..but theres so much i dont know how to tell her.... She'll be mad at me ... Or i dnt knw how is she going to react ...it was just that she was always busy with her own problems ..she always had her own issues..i did not wnt to burden her with mine.... i dnt know whether ill be telling her or not. I cannot decide.

I have an exam tomm...m really worried what m going to do..i cant sleep with all this shit going on in my head

I am missing my ex...i know he doesn't really care

I feel like drinking alcohol sleeping and not waking morow in the morn

I sometimes feel scared ..i might became an alcoholic

Sometimes i feel like running away from all this
I doubt even after getting all this will i be happy ? Or even running away will? i dont know.

I sometimes think i am running after tthings for no reasons. I want a migration from my college to another...for that a higher percentage...i am overstressing myself ...

I wish people loved me and care about me the way i want them to.....

But sometimes am just glad that they love me...

No matter how much i grow up ...i will always be a mummas girl. I still hug her and tell her that i love you three times a day ..
She's the best .

I wish i could care less , think less and be more forgiving and let go of things easily.. I wish i sulked less.

I sometimes dont like myself. Sometimes i really like myself. I sometimes like to act like a bitch but i genuinely believe am a nice girl.

I have a tattoo just below my nape ..it says BELIEVE..its simple its beautiful ...i love it.
I wish i did not suck at saying thank you.

I wish i could love people ...some people whom i ought to love ...inspite of all that they did to me or i think they did to me.